On Mother’s Day

MAJORTRUMPS.IV.TheEmpress

neolithic fertility goddess figure

For those of us whose mothers physically, emotionally, and/or sexually abused us—whether overtly or covertly—Mother’s Day can be a joyless experience. So I prefer to think of Mother’s Day as a holy day dedicated to recognition of the nurturing face of the Divine in all its manifestations.

Years ago, when i was visiting the shrine at El Santuario de Chimayo, I wandered into the back of the shrine, where a large metal fenced in area was hung with thousands of pieces of paper bearing the photos and/or prayers for relatives of pilgrims. The statue of La Conquistadora in the chapel had depressed me, as war goddesses always do, and I was feeling low in general because of the condemnatory homophobia of the church hierarchy.

As I stood there, my forehead pressed against the fence, I noticed that a stream ran by the place where I was standing. All at once I received a very strong impression of a female energy saying to me, “Don’t listen to those old men on the hill. From my womb you came, to my womb you shall return. You have a right to be here.”

Another time the Great Mother appeared to me was in a dream. I dreamed that I was standing in a kitchen facing a screen door opening to the outside world. On the other side of the screen were a group of wild animals, led by a giant sow, all gazing at me. When I looked into the sow’s eyes the message came to me, “Please don’t forget us.”

I am firmly convinced that environmental abuse—industrial pollution and despoiling of habitats—threatens ourselves and many other species with extinction. Often such abuse arises from Force and Threat based thinking on the part of corporate heads, who believe that anybody strong enough to take what he wants deserves to enjoy the spoils of victory no matter who else or what else it harms. Sometimes such abuse appears to arise from the trauma of growing up poor in rural areas where only the hardest physical labor results in bare subsistence living; in such cases, it is easy to view the Earth as an enemy and animals as either potential foodstuffs to be harvested or rivals for dwindling resources. Sometimes such abuses arise from the blinders which a privileged urban upbringing often places upon the wealthy; to such persons, “real life” is the concrete and glass of the city, and rural life is a kind of theme park rather than the source of all air, water, and food essential to human life. And sometimes, environmental abuse may serve as a “safety valve” for intense personal anger over abuses suffered in childhood.

I grew up in the New England countryside. I spent hours as a boy wandering our woods. I seldom encountered any animals or heard any birds, the latter because (he confessed to me years later) my severely abused older brother—who demonstrated in other contexts a marked sensitivity towards and caring for animals—had a habit of shooting and killing as many birds as he could find. “It was either that,” he told me, “or shoot Mom and Dad.” (A decorated Viet Nam conflict veteran and lifelong alcoholic now in sobriety over 18 years, my brother has set aside his once-hoarded firearms, recognizing that possessing them did not actually make him safer and stronger. So healing is possible, and I honor him for embracing it one day at a time.)

Anti-pollution and environmental exploitation activism is crucial if we are to rescue the Earth, its animals, and ourselves from Force and Threat consciousness run riot. But while we address corporate malfeasance, let’s not forget that corporations are run by individuals, and that a successful environmental protection campaign must also seek to re-educate the individuals responsible for voting in corporate practices that are harming life on Earth. Identifying and reaching such people can be very difficult, as they frequently view anonymity and freedom from personal accountability (“It’s nothing personal; it’s just business”) as some of the privileges enjoyed by the ruling class. But we must persist in showing these people that there is no such thing as an impersonal business decision where the health of the Earth and its creatures is concerned. •

 

A Message From “The Family”: On Living Without Fear

surrender“Fear is the mind-killer” as one of your writers has said. Fear paralyzes. Fear energizes. Fear eats away at reality, shrinking it until there is no room in it left to breathe. Awareness of fear is the first step in learning to overcome fear. Listening to fear, and learning from it, is essential if one is not to be ruled by fear.

Fear comes from a sense of vulnerability, a belief that something essential can be taken away from one by another. Underlying this meme are the assumptions that there is a difference between self and other, and that self and other are opposed. In fact this is not true in most cases. In most cases, the forces that appear arrayed against one are not enemies at all. They are simply obstacles. They do not threaten out of malign intent. They simply exist for their own purposes, which appear to run counter to one’s own.

Consider the career criminal who makes a habit of mugging old ladies. Or the violent police officer on the lookout for a victim. These are forces of nature, mindless, purposeless, driven by chemistry and morphology to seek out and inflict pain upon others. They are Pan in the Tarot deck, physical reality as God: accidental, unavoidable.

Or so they seem. In fact most terrors can be avoided if they are heeded and learned from.

Mister Rand finds this assertion appalling. He is driven by the belief that those who inflicted pain upon him intended him harm. What he does not understand fully yet is that abusers do not really see their victims. They see only themselves. Abusers are always intent upon destroying something in themselves that they believe has caused them pain, and it is this they are attempting to destroy when inflicting abuse upon their victims.

Mister Rand says, “But for practical purposes they are enemies. It is they who hit, or cut, or rape, or destroy, or gas one to death. You are splitting hairs,” he says. Yet we say that it is useful to separate out the personal from the abuse situation. Much of the true harm of the abuse comes from the abused taking the abuse personally; i.e., believing that I have brought the abuse upon myself because of something bad in me that deserves punishment. Is it not rather that the abuser would abuse anyone over which he or she felt he or she had power? Then your victimization is not the result of anything in you good or bad. You are simply in the wrong place at the wrong time from your viewpoint, like a small creature who happens to stray into a roadway just as a tank bears down upon it.

The first clue to recovery from abuse is as we see it: do not take it personally. You are not the cause, no matter what the abuser has told you. You are simply the convenient outlet for passions and frustrations that have nothing really to do with you at all. This is a hard thing to hear, and harder to accept, for as your psychologists have said, a child would rather be abused by a parent than ignored completely. But abusers do not see their victims. They see only themselves.

We will speak further on this.

— Channeled 6 November 2013.

Warnings From the Shadow

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Many years ago a client informed me that I had given her an inaccurate psychic reading. The reason, she said, was that a malevolent extraterrestrial had clouded my perceptions, causing the reading to fail.

Even if one believes, as I do, that psychic abilities and a spiritual reality exist, there are a lot of less dramatic reasons why a psychic might screw up a reading. Wanting to please a client too much is usually mine. But I also have a horror of misleading people, so naturally this phone call disturbed me.

What disturbed me even more was my client’s allegation that invisible aliens can control human minds. This has become a popular doctrine in the New Age community worldwide. ET influence has been offered as an explanation for illness, fatigue, accidents, depression, relationship difficulties and prosperity setbacks. Self-proclaimed ET representatives offer community, identity, excitement, peace and spiritual rescue to those willing to embrace the truth of the UFO underground.

All of this is an uncomfortable mirror of things I was taught when I was a Fundamentalist Christian in the seventies. In those days it was Satan and his demons that I was taught to beware rather than manipulative ETs, and the identity offered me was that of membership in the ranks of those saved by grace from the Last Judgment.

Both doctrines offer the same seduction. Both view the world “out there” as essentially malignant, and view the world inside us as invaded by evil. Both doctrines offer me the promise that someone outside myself can heal me, whether it be a Messiah or a “de-corder” removing my “ET implants.” Both doctrines promise to save me from the pain of being merely human by giving me a new, cleaner, more spiritual, higher identity as one of the reborn or one of the starborn. And both doctrines relieve me of the responsibility for facing the rage and sadness rooted in my childhood which, unreleased and unresolved, is the true cause of my dysfunctions.

It’s all reminiscent of what sociologists call millennial fever. We are still in the first years of the new millennium. A thousand years ago in Europe, on the eve of the year 1001 in the Christian calendar, paranoid doctrines increasingly proliferated. In those days, the invisible enemies were considered Jews, heretics, and demons. Jews, it was alleged, went about poisoning wells at night; heretics sought to seduce the theologically uneducated; demons crouched on one’s bed under the moon and tempted the flesh to rebel against the Creator. The world, the preachers back then said, was coming to an end. Evidence for this was the rebelliousness of youth and society’s increasing immorality, ecclesiastic corruption, and the proliferation of war, disease, and natural disaster. Watch the skies, people were told, for the Lord would soon appear in His glory to rescue the world from End Time horrors.

Now it is polluters, feminists, gay people, pro-choicers, immigrant “entitlement-takers”, crack dealers and bad ETs we are taught to fear in the night. Now it is good ETs we are taught to search the sky for. But both doctrines are fueled by the same unconscious, unresolved traumas.

Maybe it’s because I am an incest and PTSD survivor in recovery that I resist so strongly the notion that invisible ETs can take over my mind. But I don’t think so. I stand by the truth that intuition, reason, and emotional experience have proven to me: that it is I who cast the shadows that seem to pursue me.