A Message from Rand: The Ruling Fear Meditation

My late partner, Stuart “Alex” Lucker, channeled a writing exercise designed to help people identify what we want—or fear—most about a certain situation or aspect of our lives. This exercise, which I call the Ruling Passion Meditation, can be applied to subjects we would consider negative. So for this blog post, we’re going to take on the topic of our fears.

The Ruling Fear Meditation

  1. Number a sheet of paper  from 1 through 21 down the lefthand side.
  2. Set your timer for 5 minutes.
  3. Now write down everything you are afraid of, big, small, and in between. Write down whatever occurs to you, no matter how you are tempted to deny it. (Only you are going to see this exercise sheet, so you can be totally honest with yourself.)
    • The fears you write down might include fears around physical matters such as money, an upcoming vacation, losing one’s job, the roof of your house caving in, screwing up the math exam, contracting a terminal illness, nuclear war, being cut out of mother’s will, bankruptcy, staying fat forever.
    • Your fears may include inner, feeling-oriented matters such as a spouse leaving you for someone else; trouble with in-laws; the safety and happiness of your child or pet; rejection by teachers, family, and potential life-partners; feeling alone and unloved.
    • Deep intellectual, spiritual, and ethical fears, too, can be listed, such as fear that death is the end and a loving Higher Power is a fantasy; fear you have missed your true life’s purpose; fear you have chosen the wrong profession; fear that your work accomplishments will be derided, stolen, disproved, or forgotten.
  4. Try to come up with 21 different or related fears, one fear per line. If you can’t think of 21, or if you think of more than 21, list all those you can think of and stop there.
  5. Next, we’re going to grade the fears by intensity.
    • Set your timer again, this time for 2 minutes.
    • Read each fear in turn, asking yourself, “On a scale of 1 through 5—1 being the absolute worst, and 5 being simply bothersome—how strong is this fear in me today?” Number each fear from 1 to 5. Go down the list ranking each fear as quickly as possible, guessing if you’re not sure; don’t overthink it.
    • Now put a check mark next to all the fears you ranked number 1 or number 2. These are your Ruling Fears, the things, people, situations, and/or outcomes you most dread. Now you can take these fears and work on finding all the support you may need for taking action on how to prevent what you most fear from manifesting.


To book a psychic reading session with Rand and “The Family,” fill out the form below and click SUBMIT.

A Message from “The Family”: A Threefold Approach to Fear Mitigation

Mister Rand has been experiencing a great deal of anxiety concerning the fate of gay half-Jewish psychics like himself under the present political system. While to an observer this may seem a dread unlikely to be fulfilled due to the specificity of its parameters, Mister Rand’s fears are generated not by reason but by memory:

  • Mister Rand’s memory of his secular Jewish father’s dread of antisemitic persecution;
  • Mister Rand’s memory of persecution at the hands of his abused and abusive older brother;
  • A memory of the sense of Otherness which caused Mister Rand to hang back from full involvement with life from an early age; and
  • The memory of other incarnations to which he is linked on a spirit and soul level.

mercy

The multidimensionality of persistent, fearful life outlook cannot be ignored without sometimes severe repercussions in the life of the fearful one. In our observations of human existence, it appears to us that the best approach to take for clearing the soul of such limitations is an approach that employs physical, psychological, and perceptual tools in more or less equal measure.

Physical, because the neuromuscular systems bear their own memories of pain inflicted upon them in the sometimes deep past, pain that can respond well to empathic bodywork, tension-relieving exercise, dietary changes, deep breathing, progressive relaxation, sexual play, and certain medications;

Psychological, because even the most rational humans, contemptuous or dismissive of such notions as Inner Child, Inner Parent, and intergenerational trauma transmission, can respond positively to mental fear-mitigation practices such as therapeutic mentorship, mindfulness training, support group involvement, and journaling; 

Perceptual, because the way one views reality can have stress-relieving, stress-inducing, or numbing effects on the sufferer, depending upon the world-view adopted.

(Mister Rand is somewhat embarrassed by our discussing his vulnerabilities so publicly. We remind him, however, that he has complete control of what we say and how it is disseminated. We further remind him that, as his neglect of this blog has allowed his followers and their “hits” to dwindle to almost nothing, it is highly unlikely that what he writes here will spread like wildfire across public media.)

Next Time:  Fear mitigation exercise #1 — Identifying the fears that rule you.

A Message From “The Family”: Why Psychic Readings Fail

When Mister Rand first began psychic work, it was because he sought specialness and meaning for his life. In college, he was very shy, and hung back from socializing, preferring the company of one or two friends, his books, and fantasies of finding the perfect mate. He was twenty years old.

In a bookshop he discovered the first Tarot deck he had ever seen, The Aquarian Tarot, an art nouveau deck of limited trance-inducing usefulness [for him] but of considerable graphic beauty. To the friends and girlfriends of dormitory acquaintances, Mister Rand gave readings for free, and he was surprised by the positive reactions he got from those he read for. “I assumed they were remembering the things that applied to them and forgetting all the many other things that didn’t,” Mister Rand says. He had no belief in a spiritual reality or in psychic ability.

We speak of these things now because, forty-six years later, Mister Rand is still pulled from one belief system to another. His many years of experience as a consulting intuitive have given him evidence after evidence that, while much of what passes for psychic accuracy can be attributed to (1) common sense, (2) conscious or unconscious body language and voice tone reading, or (3) accident, a significant percentage of each reading contains elements that cannot be easily attributed to chance. Why, then, do so many critics of the psychic process declare that no evidence exists for psychic ability or a spiritual reality?

We find it amusing that we are discussing this, given that, as “The Family,” we embody various information gathering vectors, most of them located in Mister Rand’s unconscious.

From our viewpoint, the human mind is a doorway into a multidimensional reality connected to probability lines; other selves in other lives; and the consciousnesses of animals, plants, and the Earth itself. The Greater Self of the individual human creates a reality in which that individual human can experience spacetime directly rather than via detached observation. And part of the experience of spacetime is a narrowing of focus in which the individual human’s awareness of the nonphysical retreats from waking consciousness. This is necessary because only in physical reality and thought reality can pain exist. Therefore the individual’s consciousness must be equipped to notice spacetime opportunities for nurturance and safety, so that pain is kept if possible to a minimum.

The great challenge, therefore, for an incarnated consciousness, is to keep enough of a focus on spacetime conditions and events that the physicalized body and mind can survive and thrive the various challenges that physical reality affords, while simultaneously develop and maintain enough of an awareness of, and access to, the nonphysical realities that hope, consolation, wonder, and Divine Love may serve as tools and framing mechanisms for the individual’s spacetime experiences.

As your quantum physicists are discovering, atomic particles and processes, when observed by a human consciousness, behave differently than when they are observed by a mechanism. On the macrocosmic level, this process manifests for psychics as a shifting variability of successful psychic insight conditional upon not only the skill and detachment of the psychic reader, but also upon the willingness of the experimenter or scientific observer to allow for an expansion of his or her belief systems. In other words, Mister Rand cannot read anyone who, consciously or unconsciously, does not wish the experiment to succeed, either because of intellectual bias; a fear of being penetrated and violated by another’s consciousness; a fear of the information the reader comes up with; or emotional prejudice against “New Age” practices.

Mister Rand says to us, “Do you mean to claim that all experimenters and scientific observers participating in unsuccessful psychic experiments are biased against objective results?” We do not claim this. For there is another vector involved in failed attempts to read a subject, and that is the reader’s fear of those he or she is reading for. Mister Rand has found that if he is afraid of possible negative repercussions of participating in a reading, his fear will shut down the objective detachment necessary for a reading to succeed.

Mister Rand has experienced public humiliation as a result of a reading experiment before an audience containing significant numbers of individuals hostile to the reality of psychic abilities, and the shock of finding he could not pick up any information from those in the audience nearly caused  him to quit his psychic work entirely.

Sexual attraction to the one being read can also block a successful reading. •

Channeled November 4, 2017 by Rand B. Lee

Fools rush in where angels fear to tread

Rand_holding_light     I’ve worked as a psychic in Santa Fe and nationwide for many years. Around 20 years ago I was invited to attend a local skeptics conference. I was interested because I had long thought intuition and reason are both crucial to a balanced understanding of psychophysical phenomena, and I had been yearning to find a group that honestly and without bias investigated paranormal claims, experiences, and practices. To me a “skeptic” was an honest seeker of truth, in contrast to a “debunker,” an ideologue whose mind had already been made up, and whose purpose was to reveal as fake or erroneous a practitioner and his or her practices.
     When I arrived at the conference I sat with my host in the audience. The leader of the conference, a distinguished looking academic type, called the meeting to order and introduced me as the guest speaker. I politely informed him that I had not been told I was the guest speaker; I thought I had been invited as just another attender and observer. I noticed that he had on his table a compilation of fliers and other literature I had posted on bulletin boards around town to advertise my workshops and services; there had clearly been planning involved in the event.
     The conference leader acted confused and surprised that I had not been told I was to be the guest speaker. I glanced at the man who had invited me—the husband of a client—and the grin on his face made it clear that he was enjoying the situation. (I later realized that he resented the work I had been doing with his then-wife and that this was a form of retaliation meant to lower me in his wife’s estimation.)
     They invited me to give a demonstration of my trancework. I explained to them, essentially, that I was an agnostic spiritualist—that I did not know anything for sure about the existence of the paranormal—and I informed the group that I told my clients that I did not speak from any spiritual “authority.” A woman politely asked me if she could take my pulse as I did my trance; I told her I did not like being touched when I was in trance. Another woman asked me if my psychic abilities were proven to be imaginary, would I be willing to give up my career as a psychic? My honest answer was, “I hope I would have the courage to do so.”
     I attempted a demonstration, and it was a complete disaster. I felt surrounded by a 6 foot high, 6 foot thick, impenetrable wall. Absolutely no impressions of any kind reached me until the very end of the session, when I picked up a few mini-“hits” about two of the men in the audience. One set of impressions I received spontaneously, about a man’s popularity with his young students; the other set of impressions came as a response to a question that later proved to be a complete fabrication. At one point I saw an elderly man at the back of the audience staring at me, and the look on his face was pure unmitigated contempt. When I was done, I saw the delighted looks on the faces of a number of the audience members, and it was clear that I was not in a skeptics group, but in a debunkers group, and that they had gotten the experience they desired.
     After the meeting I was ignored by everyone in the group, and left quietly. A week or so later one of the audience members interviewed me privately, and although he was very polite, it was clear from the questions he asked, and the details he dropped about himself, that he was a conservative Catholic who believed that spiritual guides were Satanic deceivers promoting humanism above the revealed doctrines of the Church. Later he wrote a letter to the local paper claiming “Rand Lee may be the only honest psychic in Santa Fe,” a reference I believe to my hope that I would have the courage to quit my profession if proven a fake–and though some might take this as damning with faint praise, it did console me a trifle that at least one person at the conference did not believe I was a charlatan, just self-deluded.
     It took me many years to regain my confidence in my abilities. But I learned from this experience that (1) when I am in an altered psycho-receptive state my critical analytical faculties are offline, and I am unable to detect when I am being conned or lied to; (2) that I cannot read through my own fears—I must feel safe in order to relax and get objective impressions of my audiences; (3) that I cannot read people who do not wish to be read; and (4) that I have the right to say “No” to any situation aimed at humiliating me. I see now that I should have refused to give a demonstration at that meeting, and called out the man who invited me for his act of passive aggression. Not to have done so was, I fear, foolish. I regret that decision to this day.
—October 2, 2017
I’ve recently come across a very enlightening website that addresses the issue of honest skepticism vs. the current fashion in verbally abusive online pseudoskepticism. The site is http://www.skepticalaboutskeptics.org.

On Seeking Safe Haven

stained_glass_spiral

I’ve spent most of my sixty-five years of life looking for a person, doctrine,  or organization that I could build my life around. I started out looking to my parents to fulfill this role. I found early on that I could depend upon my father to provide us with shelter, clothing, food, and the luxuries of upper middle class Anglo life, but that he was largely unavailable emotionally and could not protect me from my abusive older brother. My mother I found I could depend upon to provide me with delicious meals, delightful books, affection, and consolation, except when her alcoholism and borderline personality disorder symptoms turned her manipulative, vindictive, and sexually abusive.

For years I felt torn between the two of them, and my ambivalence took an odd turn.

Mother put pressure on me to choose her over my father, which—let’s be frank—it wasn’t hard to do, given his loud, gritted-teeth complaints, self-isolation, and demands for absolute obedience. But I liked the fact that he was a writer, and I think I sensed his self-loathing, and I identified with him more than I liked to admit at the time. Now in the bedroom they shared, my father slept on the left side of the bed, my mother on the right. So at night I felt torn. If I slept on the left side of my bed, would I be symbolically choosing my father over my mother? If I slept on the right side of my bed, would I be symbolically choosing my mother over my father? So I compromised: I taught myself to sleep flat on my back, a habit I tend to follow to this day.

Once I entered adolescence, I more or less gave up trying to find refuge in my parents’ world and I sought refuge in my private dream world of comic books, science fiction, fantasy, mythology, and chaste fantasies of joining Robin Hood’s band of Merry Men, or being adopted as innocent school mascot by my brother Anthony’s Air Force Academy classmates. When I became aware of my homosexuality, I began fantasizing about finding a Mister Right, the perfect man who, in exchange for my exclusive devotion and access to my body, would console, protect, and give shape and direction to the rest of my life.

The problem was that, owing to incest trauma, I felt sex was dirty—not just homosexuality, but all sex. I got this feeling from my mother. So I decided that I did not want to be sexual at all. After my father’s sudden death in early 1971, I sought out the sexuality-free surrogate family I’d always fantasized about: I became a celibate Fundamentalist Christian for seven years.

The people with whom I worshiped were good people, genuinely trying to live by Jesus’s teachings of love and forgiveness. Although my self-betrayal ate away at me, the love and acceptance they showed me had a healing effect on me. They gave me a refuge from the storm of my life. But in the end I left the church, and Fundamentalism, in large part because I felt I had been putting on an act. Though I was indeed celibate for most of the seven years I was with them, I now know the difference between celibacy, born of lifestyle conviction, and sexual anorexia born of abuse trauma. And I was not the only one who left. Several years ago I discovered that the pastor of the last church I attended had been gay, and had committed suicide because he had not been able to reconcile his faith with his physicality.

All this took place many decades ago. Today, at 65 years old, five feet seven inches tall, and 290 pounds, I am far from healed; I like to joke that I have more issues than National Geographic. But I have a renewed faith in Divine Love, from Whose womb I was born and to Whose womb I shall return, and for Whom my homosexuality is a natural species variation, not a monstrosity or a curse worthy of damnation. And I have been fortunate in meeting numerous fellow travelers, straight, gay, in between, and undecided, whose kindness has consistently reached out to me in dark times.

So if you are tempted to give up who you are to get love, don’t give in to that temptation. Start asking for help, and keep on asking until you start getting it. It can and does get better, but only if you refuse to let your abusers win. •

A Message From “The Family”: On Human Goodness

Jeffrey Robert Lee (L); Rand Benjamin Lee (R)

Jeffrey Robert Lee (L); Rand Benjamin Lee (R)

Mister Rand has found himself deeply upset by the carnage in Florida’s gay and Lesbian nightclub, the club in which half a hundred individuals lost their physical bodies to bullets and many more were traumatized. Understand that evil is an act, not a condition; that one can say, out of rage and fear, that so-and-so is evil to have done such a terrible thing unmoved, but at root humans still are good, as all things at root are good; i.e., worthy of existing, for they have been born from the womb of God and return to it at death.

Why, then, does evil take place? It is possible to reduce one’s consciousness to a level so uncreative and closed to the value of others that one achieves a consciousness level we call To Control Absolutely, the least creative and least loving of all consciousness levels. While To Control Absolutely is no longer a level of consciousness sanctioned by the mass will of humanity as a normative attitude, nonetheless certain individuals, spurred on by fear of victimization by others, are trapped in the attitude that tells them, “The only way you will be safe is to control everyone and everything around you at all times.”

At this consciousness level, one sees everyone and everything one encounters as a character in one’s private play; a tool to use for one’s sensory and physical gratification and safety.Particularly if there is something in oneself that mirrors an attribute in the other, one may wish to harm or even kill the other as a symbolic means of harming or killing the trait within oneself that one loathes.

Many individuals speak with disapproval of how the media glorifies mass killers and similar criminals by devoting seemingly endless coverage to them. Many individuals feel that by doing so, the media encourages other individuals to commit atrocities so that they will enjoy worldwide fame, too. In certain cases this is indeed the effect that media obsession with individual criminals exerts. There is also in our view a sexual component to human interest in death: not only the desire to penetrate (with penis, bullet, etc.) and change forever the one penetrated (through unwanted pregnancy, through destruction of the victim’s mental health, through the victim’s death), but also the desire to feel godlike—to feel that one has the supreme power to bypass all moral systems and commit acts of devastation that will forever draw attention to one’s Self. These yearnings are all connected with the consciousness levels of To Control Absolutely and, to a lesser extent, of To Force.

Why does God allow acts of atrocity? We have no general answer to this. Some acts of atrocity are due to “natural” causes: geographic upheaval, weather, “accident,” and disease. Mister Rand’s brother Jeffrey died of AIDS in 1990, a virus he contracted in Key West, Florida during his time there. This was a very spiritually evolved individual who helped introduce Mister Rand to spiritualism, yet he died at age 35 a year after his beloved dog died. Mister Rand has since dreamed of him joyous and free, and has come to realize that Mister Jeffrey and their mother Kaye had business between them to complete, business that Mister Jeffrey chose to pursue by staying in Ireland and caring for her, even though, about a year before [his death], he predicted to a family friend that his mother “would be the death of” him. (Ireland had few resources at the time for caring for persons living with AIDS, and the medications now available that assist persons with AIDS to live longer did not then exist.) And of course many other deaths from disease, car accident, accident and so forth take place every minute of the human day, and to those experiencing them, or to those loving the victims of these situations, these losses can be unconsolable. If a God of Love existed, why would She permit any creature to suffer at all for any reason? All that we know is, each situation with each individual person must be taken individually for it to be understood.

Mister Rand is horrified by this statement. Are we saying, he asks, that some individuals choose [before they are born] to die horribly in the life to come, or deserve to die horribly because of bad things they have done in this life or a past life? No wonder there are angry atheists in the world, Mister Rand says, with so many religions trying to come up with excuses for why their deities have permitted evil to flourish. To this we say, the gods Mister Rand speaks of do not know pain. They do not know helplessness. They do not know victimization. In their level of reality, only love exists. To them, death is simply the walking through of a door, or an awakening from dreams. The only beings who can know what it is like to die are beings with physical bodies. And one of the reasons for incarnation is to bring the power of Love to bear against the consciousness levels of To Control Absolutely, To Force, To Threaten, and To Blame, the consciousness levels that give rise to Dachau, and Orlando, and the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire. The purpose of incarnation is the integration of Love consciousness with the mechanisms of the physical universe, so that reason and intuition, fueled by compassion, can soften spacetime’s hard edges.

For you are Good. You are Good. You are Good.•

— Channeled 6/25/16 by Rand B. Lee. All rights reserved. “The Family” is a nonhierarchical, nonauthoritarian secondary persona of  Mister Rand, created by him to convey information he cannot access readily via his conscious mind. See sidebar for  contact information.

A Message From “The Family”: On Eating Disorders

Mister Rand has long suffered from what is termed an “eating disorder,” in his case the compulsion to eat more than his body requires especially of carbohydrates, sugars, and fat-laden proteins. As a result, he has developed a deformity of the torso that weighs him down and  prevents him, he thinks, from finding love and acceptance from others whose opinions he cherishes.

Eating disorders are, as we see it, at core, disorders of the heart chakra, and they can come in many forms, such as compulsive overeating and vomiting; compulsive undereating and self-starvation; and compulsive exercising and dieting. To bring these disorders into balance, it is necessary for the sufferer to identify the core need, which is love; and to develop strategies for opening the heart both to Divine Love and to human love as well.

In the Twelve Step group “Overeaters Anonymous,” there is a series of contemplative exercises designed to accomplish just the sort of heart opening to which we refer. At root, they involve:

(1) admission of powerlessness over the addictive urge when it strikes;

(2) acknowledging that Divine Love exists and is eager to relieve any and all self-harm compulsions if that is what the sufferer truly wishes;

(3) a commitment by the sufferer to placing one’s will and life into the loving care of the Divine Healer on a daily basis;

(4) listing all the ways  one’s pain and loneliness have manifested in waking life;

(5) breaking silence by sharing this list with another human being;

(6) agreeing, one day at a time, to permitting the Divine Healer complete access to one’s innermost core being, for the purpose of adjusting one’s attitudes and actions so that they reflect our beauty rather than our pain;

(7) performing a ritual in which one formally invites Divine Healer access to one’s core;

(8) making a list of any persons we have harmed, and becoming willing to make amends to them all;

(9) making amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others;

(10) working daily to keep one’s heart open to the Divine Healer’s correction when one acts towards others out of a consciousness level of force, threat, and blame rather than the consciousness levels of  acceptance with intent to learn, understanding, giving, loving, and knowing that one is intrinsically whole;

(11) communing consciously with the Divine Healer on a daily basis, so that we may receive the daily power and blessings that Divine Love wishes to pour upon us; and

(12) offering oneself as a channel of Divine Love to other sufferers on a daily basis as opportunities arise.

It is vital to recognize that the process of recovering from eating disorders cannot take place in isolation: one must become so sick of being sick that one is willing to ask for help, despite one’s shame and inner accusers. This is why Mister Rand attends a Twelve Step meeting designed for compulsive overeaters; he has found, over time, his fear of being seen and harmed by others has diminished considerably owing to the consistent, nonintrusive love shown him by other members of the group.

Furthermore, any healing of the heart results in increased awareness of feelings, inevitably including feelings one does not wish to feel, such as shame, fear, resentment, anger, and other responses to the illusion that one is starving emotionally. A daily choice must be made to allow these feelings to come to consciousness, and to use various tools, such as writing and sharing verbally with others one can trust, for the purpose of acknowledging these feelings and releasing them on a daily basis into the love of the Divine Healer. For it is the Divine Healer alone Who can repair the damaged heart chakra; bring peace, love, and resilience to the emotional body; and silence the voice of the inner accuser who calls Mister Rand a failure and a troll.

And we thank you for sharing.•

For further information about Twelve Step programs for compulsive eaters, check out the website http://www.oa.org.